Popcorn Culture / Somewhat Topical / Television / Words, Words, Words

The WEEDS Series Finale.

Weeds series finale, episode 12

Or should I call it the series FINALLY. Weeds limped to the barn with its little remaining dignity bleeding out along the way. In episode 11, they threw random plot twists and old characters at us like it was going out of style. The problem: Weeds had so many loose ends and fragmented relationships to tie up, they weren’t able to successfully give closure to any of them.

It started off as confusing as the show has been all year. Apparently Nancy has opened a really successful, bright, and trendy medical marijuana coffee shop. The one she’s been talking about since… one sentence at the end of episode 11. Also, they skipped 10 years. But Nancy looks exactly the same. Besides two white trash blonde streaks, we wouldn’t know it has been that long. They basically gave up on the narrative making any sense whatsoever. Shane and Silas both have mustaches, so that makes them about 30. Or something. With all the time they jumped recklessly over, isn’t Nancy like 60 by now?

The only reason we knew that many years have passed is the awkward half mexican kid turned into an even more awkward half mexican man. It’s his barmitsfa, apparently, because they said it. And the poor audience is just trying to keep up with this nonsense for a half an hour.

Stevie Botwin and Guillermo

We don’t see Jill, Nancy’s sister, ever again. And the rabbi died I guess? Because instead of a man a season on average, Nancy’s love interests last only 2-3 episodes. The rabbi raised Stevie, before driving off a cliff. Or something. I have no idea.

Silas married a bitchy deaf girl and they have a kid together. I love Silas, everyone loved him and his relationships, and this is heartbreaking to me. I’m glad hes happy, but couldn’t he have gotten with Mary Kate Olsen or someone whos a little more appealing?

Shane is an alcoholic, who still looks 16 even though, according to the show’s time frame, he should be about 30. Nancy is the same irritatingly cocky yet beautiful milf she has always been. Her character is the same yet doesn’t even function as glue holding the mess together.  It falls apart. They are yelling random names from the past, throwing in any actor who they can find a 20 dollar bill for, even if they had forgotten them for so many seasons. Not my idea of “closure”.

Isabelle got a sex change. Offensive to the character, to be honest, who knows why they want to piss on the last remaining dignity these people from the past seasons had left. I can’t even keep up with the script in it’s most basic form. It is choppy, all over the place, and I’m lost.

Now enter Josh Wilson, Justin Chatwins character from season 2. I remember him well, and it makes me nostalgic for the episodes of Weeds that made sense. As Dougs only son, Weeds manages to force closure upon this relationship that we haven’t heard about in 15 years. He’s gay now. Or was he gay back in the day, 5 or 6 seasons ago, I don’t remember.  What the fuck is going on?

Nancy and Andy

Andy and Nancy had an explosive sex scene in the final minutes of episode 11. And he walked off, into the darkness. This may be the only relationship I still cared about. The dialogue between Silas and Nancy tells us that Andy moved to Renmar, California, and owns a restaurant, and has a daughter. Cool sounds good. I’m too tired to argue.

The half mexican doesn’t speak spanish.

“One finger, she’s too young, five fingers, she’s too old.” Thank you for the lovely visual. That must be their attempt at comedy.

“Shane.. What happened to you?”

Yeah we are wondering the exact same thing. What is going on? What happened to all of the characters?

For a show that I have followed for 8 seasons, 101 episodes, not missing a beat, I surely was disappointed. Skipping another huge chunk of time did not answer any questions the fans had, but it confused and disoriented us even further. In the final scene, they all sit down and smoke a joint. Nancy stares intently into the yard. I am someone who cries during TV all the time. I am emotional, feeling what the show intends at all moments. In this series final moment, I feel nothing.

I choose to remember Weeds as the fun and unexpected situation comedy it was. Not the train wreck it turned into. Is this a happy ending? Who knows, who cares.

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